where have i been?

July 13, 2009 at 9:07 pm (Uncategorized)

even i don’t have the answer to that one.  life has just been crazy, and not necessarily in a good way. my son has been visiting his cousins for several weeks (thanks auntie) and i had so many plans to get ‘things’ done.  lists of projects, things to see and do, etc. well some of the things have been accomplished, but more have simply fallen by the way-side. in the past i have always been the one to tell friends, family, etc. ‘snap out of it’; never really understanding what it feels like to just not really care or be motivated by anything. (i’m baring my soul here) napping has never been more important to me than right now, i’m having a hard time caring about anything (except for the fact that i can’t care about anything)!

i’ve been taking supposedly mood altering drugs for the last couple of years; i don’t think my mood is altering for the better right now.  i feel like i’m just floating with no clear direction. do you ever feel like you need a total life change? this is where i am right now. ready to sell all our possessions and move to central america or start a commune, live off the grid and raise chickens (this one is at the top of my list). i don’t think i’m in any frame of mind to be making these huge decisions. dear husband is at a loss. he is usually the one in the funk and i tell him to ‘get over it’; this time its me.

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